And I can't stop writing about her.

I'll never be able to stop writing about her.

But let me know in two years, I'm sure something'll work itself over.

I can't help but think.

Sometimes I think my life would be better in the third-person-not-affected-by-first-person-emotions life.  As much as I'll tell you I try my best not to have feelings extend beyond friendship, and WAY before relationships, they happen. I'll get a girlfriend. Up until a little less than two years ago, I could've sworn I was right.

Then I let my mind obsess. I told it "Think what you want to think. There's nothing society can tell you otherwise. It's your mind, and you should only care what it tells you."And I will- I couldn't stop thinking of this one girl. Probably the second-only obsession I've had in high school, and it's clear the first one should've ended well within the first three weeks. But it's amazing how long it dragged on. I didn't have a moral balance to tell myself what I was thinking couldn't be healthy for future decisions. But it's only right for me to say I've had relationships past that two-year-ago mark where all I could think about was her, and I can't help to think it's because I let my mind get carried away.

But in this current relationship, it's withered away. It started strong- nothing but feelings for the girl in the relationship. As time ran along, I started pulling out pros and cons, "why's" and "if's". I just can't believe that one moment where all seemed doomed made me realize I had such deep feelings for her. And it wasn't until I started talking about it to my obsession that she clearly put it in perspective, and made me want her back like how it all started.

Bottom line is I shouldn't be allowed to date. Not now, not ever. Not unless it's clear in my mind I can ever make it bulletproof.

There's a moment in every relationship/argument...

...where you can put the phone down and everything will be okay.

Just let the opposing party know you have to put the phone down for a little bit to avoid mixing your feelings into your logic.

Review- Neuro 'Bliss' water

Dammit all, this packaged water idea's making me a little sick. And quite frankly, so is the water.

Here's the deal; Every time I go in to deposit a check or earn some pocket money, I celebrate a little. I walk into the King Soopers off of 80th and Wadsworth (yes, that overkill of a market) and go directly to the beverage refrigerator on the far right portion of the store. No big deal. I always pick out my beverage of choice- Powerade Zero in Strawberry. Delicious stuff. Only today was different- no more Powerade Zero in Strawberry. In fact, no Powerade Zero variety at all. So here I am, looking at these hippie excuses for tea, Sobe vomit in a plastic container, JUICE (as if the world hasn't stopped packaging nature already) and finally, my eyes rest upon the bright, retina blinding primary colors of Neuro water.

I've heard rants about this damn water all over Facebook, claiming their 'effects' work. Now, me being all sassy and what not, I strongly dislike when people think carbonated water gives off superpowers. With the amount of Diet Coke I've drank in my life, I should be Superman. NO- Iron Man...with cancer.

Anyways, I decide to buy this overpriced 14.5flOz of white water. As I'm walking to the register, I'm reading the bottle. In the bottom left corner of the label, it reads strongly that no claims on the bottle were, or are, approved or researched by the FDA. So now I'm thinking I'm carrying a bottle full of horse sperm. No big deal- it's on sale.

These claims on the bottle- let's read them specifically:

- Helps reduce stress
- Enhances mood
- Provides focused concentration
- Promotes a positive outlook

AND BEHOLD, I TAKE A DRINK.

First thought- it's flat Fresca. It is! All of this is marketing BS. I'm sure somewhere the corporation that distributes Fresca is in a desperate situation to get more business, because who likes Fresca? No one. That's who likes Fresca.

On my way home, I'm yelling at old people to get off the road. So now I'm pretty set on the idea that Neuro doesn't want to sell to old people. Sounds legit. Anyways, there goes the claim that it reduces stress. There's my second thought.

Third thought- I'm not singing along to Katy Perry. As we all know, you're in a damn good mood if you're singing along to Katy Perry. I most certainly wasn't. So there goes the whole 'enhances mood' BS.

I do think it improved my concentration. I can only say that much so far. Here's my reasoning- Pomona was having a Car Wash and they brought out the cheerleading squad. So essentially there are high school girls in bikinis. I drive by them and all I could think of was Katy Perry. So yeah, concentration savvy water here.

I'll leave that fourth one up in the air. Buying the water makes you feel good, sure. It's a futuristic-looking water bottle that isn't plastered with sponsors or graphics- it gets right to the point. Frankly, most packaging should be that way anyways. We don't need to be sold by 90's marketing techniques. That's out the door seven years ago!

So while I hate this water, I can't give it any more thought. Mainly, because it's going to pass right through me. Secondly, Katy Perry.

Just finished my first week at UCD

...just thought you should know.

Tomorrow...

...I join a bowling league.

SUCK IT.

Really, it's only getting worse.

...but really now, it's only for the better. Not sadistic, I swear. There's just less left to ponder about human psychology. The guilt and 'pain' associated with learning the truth can only deficit a negative outcome, and substantially emphasize positivity.

I really don't need a pat on the back for everything. I'm a goddamn adult.

And let me tell you, I've tried thinking both sides out. There's no winning with jerks. Everyone's an attention whore- It's just another particularly irritating deficiency in our civil construction.

Aside from all of that, everyone relies on trust more than is granted. It's like subconsciously allowing for a safety net, while imagining everything will go great regardless of what the opposing party says.

Anyways, this is all a result of my stupid jump-to-conclusions-obsessed-with-a-girl-that-has-no-attachment-to-me.

I'll leave with a picture.